Personal

Where Have I Been?

Stephen Majewski — Fri, 10 Mar 2006 15:42:00 GMT

Well, it's been far too long since I've posted anything to this blog. I really have no excuse outside of laziness. Plenty of stuff has been going on in the realm of nerdiness, I just have lost some of the spark to sit down and put it into words.

I've considered skipping the "formal" written outlet for a more informal audio podcast, but as of yet I've not been able to find someone willing to put in the effort to assist me on a regular basis. Quite frankly, me sitting in front of a mic babbling for an indeterminate amount of time leaves little to be desired, so I was hoping for the dynamic aspect of at least two people chatting. For now, that remains a pipe dream.

In any case, I hope to light a fire under my butt and get back to spilling my thoughts out for you all soon. Type at you later.

Friends Don't Let Friends...

Stephen Majewski — Thu, 19 Jan 2006 23:29:00 GMT

As a geek, I can't stand to see entertainment systems incorrectly connected. My recent vacation to Florida exposed me to a well known but highly avoided portion of our society, the technically challenged. You see, a few years ago my father purchased a 50" Samsung LCD projection TV. He emailed pictures of it talked about how special it was. Now, two years later, I roll into town for a visit. After staring at an ugly analog signal being abused and gigantisized by the television, I took it upon myself to reconnect everything good and proper.

First, there was the cable box. It was connected to the TV through (gasp) coax cable. On the back of the box, I'm staring at the lovely lovely component video outputs just begging to be put to good use. After digging through a nest of cables my father keeps in his storage shed, I was able to find what I needed to get the cable box hooked up. A quick flip over to Discovery HD, and my mom's jaw hit the floor. You guessed it, for roughly two years they have been paying for HD content and not actually using it.

Next, there's the DVD player. Similarly to the cable box, it was hooked up using (gasp gasp gasp) composite video. I mean, not even S-Video despite the fact that the jack for it was right there. Either way, it didn't matter. The problem was, the DVD player was a Sony DVD/VCR combo thing. Not too big of a deal until you lose the remote (as my father did). It turns out this particular unit doesn't work with low end universal remotes (in this case, I was trying to use the TV remote).

Out of three DVD players in the house, none would be adequate for this setup. Two were missing remotes and would not work with universal remotes and the other was older than dirt and thusly did not support progressive scan. Naturally, I did what any well meaning son with a comfortable income would do...I high tailed it to the nearest Best Buy to pickup an acceptable DVD player. The model I chose (I shall not discuss, since I didn't use it enough to review it) happened to support upscaling to 720p and 1080i, which I guess is a plus.

When all was said and done, I left feeling as though my work had been accomplished. Somehow I managed to avoid having to do computer technical support for the 14 days I was there (a miracle in itself), so a little wire jockeying didn't hurt so bad. I was able to reconfigure the entire entertainment system and in the process make it a bit easier for my mom to use.

What's the moral of the story? Simple, if you love someone, properly setup their entertainment system for them. If they don't come back to you and say, "Ahhhhhh, that awesome. I feel so special for knowing (or giving birth to) you," then take away their equipment and tell them they're not worthy.

Sweating in Seattle

Stephen Majewski — Fri, 14 Oct 2005 21:43:00 GMT

Okay, as promised I'll talk more about my recent trip to Seattle (whether you like it or not). So here goes...

As is required by all employees of Avanade, I was sent to Seattle (where our corporate offices are located) to attend some basic training. The training is like a boot camp on how to be an Avanade consultant. The rest would really just bore you to tears, plus I'd probably have the intellectual property police come down on me.

Seeing as how I've got a few different things to discuss, I found it easier to break them into sections. That way I appear less crazy when I suddenly jump from one topic to another.

Culture Shock

One great aspect of this training is the opporunity to meet people from all over the world. I believe we had 3 guys from the Netherlands, 2 guys from Germany, 1 guy from France, a girl from Thailand, and a girl from Japan (my apologies if I left anyone out). On top of this, there was a wide mixture of cultures from consultants already in the United States.

Unfortunately, I didn't get a chance to speak with all the visitors. You do the best you can in the limited time you have. Plus, with my slight hearing loss, interpreting a thick accent in a noisy room is damn near impossible.

An interesting conversation was initiated by one of the guys from the Netherlands. We had a refrigerator in the training room filled with soda; some of which was root beer. Whereas Americans wouldn't think twice about this, he found it odd we would be provided alcohol. Naturally he asked his table (where I happened to be sitting that day) just what root beer is. What do you say? It's a drink. What does it taste like? Root beer.

Seeing as how I was being of little use to his American experience, he bit the bullet and picked up a can for himself. Needless to say, he discovered that root beer did not quite suite his pallet and decided to go with one of the more traditional beverages. It's a shame, really. I'm actually quite fond of root beer myself.

System Shock

While out in the Seattle area, I got a chance to do a little walking around (I wouldn't call it sight seeing, since I really wasn't specifically seeing the sights). I learned there are 2 things you need with you at all times in Seattle: an umbrella and a towel. The umbrella is for the rain which will inevitably fall 50% or more of the time. The towel is for the puddles of sweat you create from taking a few steps outside.

Okay, I grew up in the South and spent many years living in a coastal city. However, it seems my tenure in Denver has desensitized me to the mass amounts of moisture that finds its way into the air of coastal city. Even in 60 degree weather, I was sweating buckets. I swear I don't sweat that much when I mow my lawn when it's 100 degrees outside.

Okay, most likely I do sweat that much. But the dehydrated climate of Colorado wants that moisture more than you do, so it's gone almost as quickly as you can shed it. Seattle is a bit more forgiving and is willing to let you, your clothes, and anything else with which you have contact have all that sweet sweet moisture.

Caffeine Shock

Okay, it's Seattle…the birthplace of Starbucks. I thought I would be so inundated with Starbucks that I would expect all walking directions to include "take a right at the third Starbucks" in them. Somehow, I managed to traipse around downtown Seattle for 2 days before seeing a Starbucks.

In fact, up until that point, I had seen 2 of a competing coffee chain called Tullys. By the time I had left, I had seen 3 Starbucks and 3 Tullys. To top it off, I never even stepped foot in either establishment (which is just weird since I love me some coffee). I have been informed by others that perhaps I was just walking in the wrong places and that there are in fact quite a number of Starbucks in downtown Seattle. All I can say is what I saw.

What gets me is that I can stand on a corner of downtown Denver and see a Starbucks in a hotel lobby, a stand alone store directly across the street, and another further down the road. I expected Seattle to be much worse. Maybe I was walking the wrong beat.

I'm Back

Stephen Majewski — Thu, 01 Sep 2005 18:11:00 GMT

Well, it’s been a few weeks and it’s time to get back on the blogwagon. I took a tiny hiatus for medical reasons and to do some soul searching to get in touch with my inner nerd. As a result, I’ve decided to alter the format of the blog a tad.

In the past, I’ve been haphazardly blogging, usually about topics that occur in my life or directly relate to me (talk about self-centered). However, yours truly tends to run short in the "making stuff up" department, and the content can run a bit dry when there’s a lull in life happenings (the life of a nerd is oh so exciting).

In order to give myself more blog fodder, I’ve decided to do some commenting on tech news as well. Rather than just regurgitate details from the various news sources (mainly podcasts), I’m going to attempt to add my own flavor of colorful commentary. Hopefully, this will give me more stuff to talk about (arghh..ending a sentence in a preposition!!!)

For now, I’m going to call it a day, since I foolishly left my headphones at home and typically can’t remember anything I hear on a podcast 5 minutes later (I’ll need to take notes).

Bathroom Dilemma

Stephen Majewski — Wed, 04 May 2005 16:10:00 GMT

This morning was like any other. I was running a tad late, but nothing unusual. I was taking my morning shower, washing off the funk of the previous day. As I repositioned to wash my feet something odd happened. I found myself moving backwards; beyond the wall. Tiles began to crash down around me. I learned the hard way that tile bathroom walls need to be resealed every so often.

The wallboard was nice a soggy. A fine black, white, and gray powder emanated from the hole. We got this house a year ago. Rule #1 with a new house, do anything that you should do regularly regardless of whether or not you think it's needed.

Fixing this little dilemma will be no small task. Luckily, I'm people who know people, so I'll be able to get some help and TRY to do it myself. With strong allergies and a lack of desire to smell the funk for the next few days, I've begun clearing out the wall (this is me taking a break to clear my head, since it's getting hard to breathe).

For now, I give you a view of my progress. The original hole was roughly a 5x5 square of tiles. The black stuff on the insulation is mold. Thankfully, according to some people, it's not too bad.

A Piece of Procrastination Pie

Stephen Majewski — Fri, 29 Apr 2005 18:31:00 GMT

Anyone who knows me knows that I am a horrible procrastinator. Even this BLOG, as easy as it was to setup, took over a year to get going. I’m rather surprised I’ve managed to keep the postings coming (probably while I’m procrastinating on something else). To make matters worse, the stress normally caused by leaving something to the last possible minute (or beyond) usually rolls right off my back.

I have noticed that my procrastination on personal tasks does tend to lead to one thing, an explosive rush not unlike certain intestinal conditions to get it done. Since personal tasks normally don’t have deadlines, they can just sit there and sit there and sit there. It’s almost as if the bubble bursts and I suddenly have to do whatever it is that needs to be done right this minute. This leads to a rather different kind of stress, since it is merely my own desire that is driving me. When something computer related is involved, such as code or hardware stuff, this is when my tail feathers will start to ruffle.

When a piece of code isn’t going my way then the verbal floodgates open. Oddly enough, I code for the enjoyment factor. Many people may question why I would do something that can so easily twist my panties into a knot. Probably for the same reasons people play sports. In sports, you don’t always win, and when a team is losing they’re usually pretty pissed off. It’s the same way with code. I sit down with an objective and if I start losing I get pissed.

Sadly, this short fuse does little to help with my domestic life. It is not uncommon for my wife to comment on how she is avoiding me because she heard me swearing down in my office. The real problem occurs when the water is starting the boil but hasn’t overflowed yet. Then she’s likely to walk right in and get hot water thrown in her face.

Take last night, for example. I was having a rather troublesome time with a piece of code I was writing. The techniques were new to me and it, of course, didn’t initially work that well. The little hot head in me was fuming. She found herself caught in the midst of the ensuing maelstrom, and ended up getting knocked around a bit (metaphorically, not physically).

The good news is I normally can get through a session of coding with little issue. I handle the normal bumps in the road with no cause for alarm. It gets ugly when something takes a big shit on me and I can’t get myself clean. The funny (strange not ha ha) part is, if I would just walk away and clear my mind the answer will usually present itself. Don’t try telling me that when I’m foaming at the mouth, though.

Yard Woes

Stephen Majewski — Fri, 08 Apr 2005 20:16:00 GMT

I looked into my backyard and saw the grass growing growing growing!!! I found that the waterspout on the back of the house had been leaking, turning part of the yard into an unpleasantly squishy marsh that was growing like crazy. The rest of the yard lay in yellow greenish death, trying desperately to keep up with the marsh. Not feeling too comfortable about this imbalance, I decided to prep the sprinkler system for the spring.

First, let me say I am fully aware that it is April. Second, this is Colorado. Third, had I left the sprinklers alone, the month might have passed fairly uneventful. However, seeing as how I’ve gone through the trouble to crawl under my house to turn on the water line feeding the sprinkler system, reprogram the sprinkler computer, clean up the yard, and fight the lawnmower seasonal start-up battle, nature has decided to send a snowstorm my way.

Note to self, “Let the grass stay dead.”

In the midst of cleaning up the yard, I learned a valuable lesson. You see, last fall I decided not to rake my yard. Don’t ask me why and I won’t tell. I have two rather large trees near my house, one in front and one in back. Both decided to drop their entire payload (along with the occasional bit of garbage) onto my yard.

It appears the leaves gathered into communities in order to stay warm during the winter. These piles destroyed whatever they touched, especially grass. So now, to reward my procrastination, I have several large dead spots in my yard and 3 trashcans, 2 large trash bags, and 2 recycle bins full of leaves…and a pile of leaves with nothing in which to put them.

As if this all wasn’t enough, at one point during the winter I ran out of some special pills for my dog. These pills keep her death dealing urine from destroying my yard. In the week or two in which she did not receive the pills, she managed to deaden a gigantic circle of grass. The irony is the non-alien created pee circle sits within the squishy marsh; a constant reminder that I am, in fact, an idiot.

At this point, you are probably wondering to yourself, “Why, oh, why have I read this far?” Suffice to say, you must have a passion for a green yard much like I do (because I would never imply that you have too much time on your hands). If I had my druthers, I’d rip up the whole lot of it and go with some of this stuff.